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Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Management

Alright if I am going to write  about healing I have to start somewhere.  I haven't had much to say as far as the written word for awhile.  However, I know in order to get going again you just gotta get something down on a consistent basis so here goes ;)
As I stated in an earlier blog music can be healing in so many ways.  I like to use various songs to coincide with whatever I have going on inside. * Important not the other way around!  I do not listen to songs and allow them to dictate how I feel instead I pay close attention to what I am feeling inside and try to find music that speaks to that emotion or mood.
Anger!  It can be destructive or it can be channeled into an extremely powerful motivating force rivaled by no other.  It is a challenge learning how to feel anger without releasing it in extreme ways that cause chaos and unhappiness.  I am trying to learn to not let the actions of others dictate my feelings but cmon I am in a human suit just like the rest of you.




a) The more I LEARN the redder it gets.

b) One particular line in this song makes sense to what I am dealing with in so many ways  "You used to beg me to take care of things, then smile at the thought of me failing."
I choose not to write out the full details of the situations I am talking about here, it goes way back into childhood territory.  I need to write this out somewhere though in length just for myself.  That is the great thing about writing, you can choose to go all out or not.  I think I have learned that it is sometimes best to not share every detail but still write enough to where others can relate.


First comes the acceptance that you are feeling pain.  To try and lie to yourself and say that you don't care and that you are not attached to any of it is useless until you work through all of your emotions and can say that you are not attached and truly mean it.

 Second comes the anger in having to deal with that pain and sometimes not knowing what to do with it.


My personal belief is that if you want to heal then you have to be willing to face every part of yourself including the parts that make you sick to your stomach.



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